Communication Break Downs

It’s Saturday morning, it’s early, and not too bright. The sun was just barely lighting the sky, but the cloud cover was blocking it’s light anyways. I was awakened by a very unhappy Mia. Not knowing exactly why she was waking in this state, we went through the motions. But her tantrum continued to accelerate into a meltdown. After several trips to the bathroom, several breakfast options, and sensory toys galore, it was clear that Mia was not going to come out of this anytime soon. Her meltdown status was clearly invoked by her inability to tell me what was wrong, and I felt like a horrible mother for not being able to figure it out.

Our plan for the day had been to meet up with a friend to do some ice fishing. I was in hopes that we would still be able to make the trip, even though we would now be slightly delayed. I plugged my ear buds into my phone and cranked the music, allowing Mia to holler as she needed to while I gathered our fishing gear. I was hoping once she saw the traps, she would realize what fun was in store for the day and it would help her calm down. But she carried on anyways.

I further gathered the necessities of the day, dressed, had my coffee and breakfast, and then helped Mia get dressed once she finally calmed down. She ate her breakfast when she was ready, and soon was in much better spirits. I was in hopes that the rest of the day would be filled with her smile and giggles. But either way, I decided to carry on with our plans. We packed up the vehicle and headed out.

The drive to our destination was a long one. Well over an hour. Once we hit the last stretch, I stopped at a store so Mia and I could use the restroom. Another tantrum ensued as she refused to sit on the public toilet. I can’t blame her, most restrooms smell funny, have odd lighting, and the flush is ridiculously loud. She did not appear to have to use the toilet at all. So we washed our hands on the way out, put some fuel into the truck, and continued on.

Almost big enough to drive!

It wasn't long before we reached the lake. A quick text to a friend who was already on the ice, ensured us a four wheeler ride to the shacks that he and his friends had set up. While we waited for his arrival, I helped Mia get into her snowsuit. She seemed agitated by this, but we continued on anyways. I was unclear of how Mia would react to being on a four wheeler, since this would be her first time. But I figured that because it had wheels and threw wind in her face, she would love it. And I was right.

Soon, we were heading down the lake, and Mia was giggling with delight. When we stopped, we all dismounted the wheeler, but Mia wanted more. Telling her that we would ride again later proved to do nothing in terms of deterrence. She started having a fit because she wanted to ride more.

I tried to get her mind off of the wheeler by walking around with her. My friend also tried to catch her attention to no avail. Another meltdown started to take place. Then my friend got the idea that we should go get the glorified “pee bucket”. Maybe Mia did have to go to the bathroom after all. We took another ride on the wheeler to get it, and then back again. The ride calmed Mia down, but the moment we stopped, she went right back into tantrum mode.

I again tried to get her mind off of things. She didn't have to go to the bathroom. My friend offered her some yummy snacks. But nothing worked. This was so unusual for Mia. Normally, even when she’s having a bad day, activities that she likes, such a ice fishing, are a happy time. And, with her sudden interest in the male gender (I've got a little flirt on my hands), you would've thought she would be even more ecstatic to be here. But, something else is going on in Mia’s world.

A dog came over to greet Mia, and she’s never been fond of dogs that like to get in her space, but she turned away to avoid him. And then, the dog did what dogs do when they want attention. He jumped on her. Mia fell to the ice, and in an instant her meltdown turned into one of the worst I've seen in a long time.

That was pretty much the end of our ice fishing trip. I tried for several minutes to get Mia to calm back down, but it was clear that she was completely upset. Our little adventure on the ice lasted merely an hour. The truck ride back home calmed Mia slightly, but she continued on this sequence for the remainder of the weekend.

Truth be told, this isn't the first time this has happened with one of our outings this winter. Mia has become increasingly aware of the world around her, and even more so with the fact that communication is the key to being heard. Her meltdowns these day are coming from complete frustration in not being able to communicate her thoughts. And I can’t blame her. I’d be upset too if I couldn't speak my mind.

So, I’m working on a new plan. Trying to find a way to help Mia communicate more effectively. PEC’s isn't working for her, so something new needs to happen. I've got an appointment set up with Mia’s teachers and speech therapist to give them my ideas on the situation, and to see what they have to offer for input. I've also set up some appointments for Mia to be seen by her neurologist  Because one of the anti-epileptics she is on could cause some changes in behavior, and some seizure activity could be in play here. I'm covering all the areas just to be sure.

Have any of my readers ever been in this communication break down with their kiddos? I’d love to hear how you overcame this hurdle with your little one!